I cried in the gym today.
As a result, I left my workout early and completely forgot to weigh myself. I haven't had a great week when it comes to food and working out so that's probably for the best. Turning over a new leaf today and I'll make sure I weigh myself in a week's time.
I'm not 100% sure why I cried this morning (I mean, it's hard not to cry when doing Russian Twists, but there's more to it than that).
Strength training involves lifting to failure. You aim for ten reps but can only do seven, next time you aim for ten and only manage eight, maybe the next time you manage ten, hurray! Time to up the weight and start all over again.
I'm finding it exhausting. I want to stick at a weight that I can do, feel it getting easier for a while, then up the weight or the reps slightly and stick with that for a while. I'm not fussed about fast progress, I just need to be able to stay consistent and keep enjoying my training. It feels hard at the moment. I'm pushing myself too much.
I don't like failing, I'm not someone who fails. I deal with plenty of closed doors and rejection in my career, I need a safe space in my non-work life to feel like I'm not failing.
All this improving yourself, it's pretty hard isn't it? But living an unhealthy, unfulfilled life is harder. I got a reminder of that today, have a look at my instagram to see why.
This is so not what I wanted to chat to you about today! But my original idea will have to wait until next week. Until then, plenty of yoga and meditation for me, a couple of runs if the weather stays clement, and doing my best to eat well and log everything on myfitnesspal. I need to be gentle with myself for a few days.
SSV x
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